The other day I was feeling a little low about things and so I had a little ramble on twitter about some of the things that I wasn't feeling very happy about. I work with a team of 7 people and 5 of those are boys/men and there's two females me and another lady who is actually quite a bit older than me (my mum's age). They are all good guys and It's not like they're not nice but sometimes I can't help feeling quite alone or sort of left out. Most of the time they'll be talking about games, drinks, foot ball and well y'know all the manly things! I find a lot of the time they talk about girls or customers who they serve and they'll add comments like 'Oh she was hot' or 'She was pretty!' and as silly as this might sound it actually makes me feel a little bit jealous. I don't like any of the guys I work with in a romantic way so that wasn't why I was jealous but I was jealous because I felt like any guys would never really say that about me. I have never felt 'beautiful' 'pretty' or 'hot' and I compare myself A LOT to other girls which I know is really unhealthy to do and I'm trying so hard not to do that. I'm going to be honest here, I have actually never had a boy friend and sometimes I've felt like I have never been good enough to be someone's girlfriend or no guy has ever considered me as 'pretty'. I guess what I'm trying to say is I've always been really insecure about my body and my image. I don't want to write a whole long post about my inscurities and flaws and things like that, maybe I will one day so I won't go into a lot of detail about that in this post. As I was writing about how I felt on twitter I got a message from one of my followers I was talking about how I have never had any confidence and how I'm going to start finding the confidence within myself and I got a reply saying "I think if you're willing to then by time it will happen. Hopefully sooner than later so you'll realize that you're at an+ an important age where a woman must focus on herself, goals & happiness & the last thing should be men's opinions"
That might not make much sense as this is just part of the convesation but the last bit about focussing on yourself, goals and happiness and basically not worrying about what men or anyone thinks of you that's seemed to have stuck in my mind because I think this is something we all need to do. Other peoples opinons shouldn't really matter, the only thing that matters is what you think of yourself. When you find that confidence in yourself that's when you'll start to see the beauty that's always been there but you have just never seen it or felt it. I hope this all makes sense, I just wanted to share with you that little piece of adivse I was given because I think that's something I need to follow by.
It would also be nice to have some more girls to work with so we can talk about girlie things haha!